Sarah Palin can't play a tune on a bass drum

It's been more than four years.

I was introduced to Sarah Palin at the exact same moment that 99 percent of Americans who live south of Canada were. When John McCain put her on the Republican ticket, I could see why.

McCain was no hard-line conservative. He needed someone to appeal to those voters. Palin's resume smacked of fundamentals: gun-toting hunter of everything from mouse to moose; staunch pro-life mother of five, including a special needs child; and wife of a man who has worked in the oilfield who was, therefore, a huge supporter of a national energy policy that would increase local drilling that environmental groups have successfully lobbied Congress to regulate.

Her resume is sterling silver. So why do I dislike her so much? Given the two platforms, I would prefer Palin's resume to that of President Barack Obama.For years, I have questioned myself about why she was such a big reason that I cast my first vote for a Democrat for president. It's not because she is a woman. I was a campaign manager for three campaigns before my career in newspapers began. All three were for female candidates.

After her Conservative Political Action Conference speech Saturday, I finally figured out why I don't like her. It's because she talks.

I don't mean her funny little Alaskan accent or homespun phrases. I have family along the Oklahoma-Texas border. I know about funny accents.

I mean the content of her speech.

And I don't mean I disagree with everything she says. I don't. I mean, it is the way she says it. She is that girl in high school who knows she is good-looking and, therefore, nothing she does or says can be questioned. And like Palin during an election, the only time she is ever nice to you is when her football-playing boyfriend puts her up for homecoming queen and she needs your vote.

She is equal parts insulting and thin-skinned. She tells men to man-up and says they don't have "the cojones" to get things done. If a liberal pundit said something ! along th e same lines about Palin, she would attack them as sexist.

Palin loves to attack the "lame-stream media" while working as a commentator for the top-rated news channel in America. All of her positions are based in insults. She jokes about teleprompters, community organizers, and calls the president "Professor Obama."

Her speeches sound so wonderful. We need to be "the land of the free and home of the brave." I've heard that one before. She wants to keep her "God, guns and constitution." She talks about crony capitalism and bureaucrats as if Obama invented them.

She spoke for more than 35 minutes and received about a dozen standing ovations. However, she couched every comment in insults and didn't leave anyone with any idea of what a Sarah Palin presidency would actually attempt to accomplish. Big ideals don't lend themselves to detailed governance.

She hinted and insinuated her way through the speech and never let on which candidate she supported or didn't support.

Those big ideas sound great, but you can't play a tune with a bass drum. It makes a nice foundation, to be sure. But if you don't add anything to it, all you have is noise.

Palin gives us political noise. She rallies the base and drums up fervor.But there is never a tune to dance to. Thus, conservatives are left with higher blood pressure and more hate for liberals and bureaucrats and plutocrats ad infinitum.

But they are also left with no leader to follow. That's why so many different candidates have won primaries early in the Republican primary process.

Bluster does not equal ideas. Talking points aren't leadership. That's why I like Palin's resume, but I would never hire her for a job.